How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
My cat gives me a boner
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
