There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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