You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize
