He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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