I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
