Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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