i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize
