I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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