Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
