how do flat chested girls get laid?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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