and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
