i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
