I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
