I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
She is in my trunk
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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