He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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