summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
