a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
