I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize