so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize