Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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