Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
i out mim tonsoeep
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