But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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