there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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