So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
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