i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
