WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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