drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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