My hair reeks of homosexuality.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Operation Purity has been aborted
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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