i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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