so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
