the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
well, you know. whores of a feather.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
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