Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
