Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
