sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
What a dumb baby whore.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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