They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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