Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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