It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
