Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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