omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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