some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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