Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
