I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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