if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Randomize
