dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
