It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
