I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Randomize
