If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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