Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
