Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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