okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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